The football world is in a tizzy after it emerged that tech billionaire and global LGBT icon Tim Cook had offered Manchester United star Marcus Rashford a $99 million contract.
The catch: Rashford will appear in pro-LGBT promotional campaigns at every public event he attends through 2026! 😱
⚡ “A football-tech handshake — but also a test of courage?”
According to a fictional source from Global Sports Mirror, the negotiations, which were said to be “secret but dramatic,” took place at a luxury hotel in California last week.
An anonymous source said:
“Tim Cook doesn’t just want a commercial partnership — he wants to create a cultural icon.
Rashford represents the younger generation, a voice for social justice, and a humanitarian heart.
Cook believes he could be the perfect face to connect sports, technology, and gender equality.”
💸 The “huge” contract that makes waves at Old Trafford
If this (simulated) offer becomes a reality, Rashford will become the world’s highest-paid player off the pitch, surpassing Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi in the field of social advertising.
According to The Fake Times, the contract includes three notable clauses:
Rashford will appear in at least 12 public events a year with LGBT rights organizations.
He will wear the “Equality Forever” logo at official press conferences.
All profits from the first campaign will be donated to programs that support young people experiencing gender discrimination.
😮 Fans are divided: “Is this a historic moment or a bold PR stunt?”
Social media exploded with millions of comments in just a few hours.
🗣️ “Rashford is brave! This is a big step for sport and equality.”
💬 “$99 million to promote peace and respect – I support!”
😬 “Personally, I think football should stay away from politics and society.”
Some Manchester United fans have created the hashtag #RashfordForEquality, saying it could be “a turning point in the club’s image becoming more global and modern”.
🧠 Media expert: “Tim Cook is playing a strategic game”
According to a simulation expert from Media Pulse, Tim Cook — known for “softening power with a positive image” — may be testing the first global sports-social-branding campaign.
“If Rashford agrees, this will be an unprecedented boost for both Apple and the LGBT community.
It turns football into a tool to spread the message of equality, not just a sport.”
⚽ Marcus Rashford has not spoken out, but actions speak for themselves
As of the time this simulation article was published, Rashford has remained absolutely silent on social media.
However, astute fans discovered that he had just liked a post with the content:
“Courage means doing the right thing even when the world watches.”
(Courage is doing the right thing even when the whole world is watching you.)
The online community immediately speculated that this could be a hidden signal that Rashford is seriously considering this shocking offer.
🌍 “When sport and humanity intersect”
Whatever the truth, this mockumentary story is spreading as a symbol of the power of human values in the new era.
Tim Cook – the head of one of the world’s largest corporations – and Marcus Rashford – a player loved for his kindness – if truly working together, could create a new chapter for both sport and modern society.
“Sometimes the greatest goals don’t come from the pitch – they come from the heart,”
— World Today Weekly commented in an emotional editorial.